Like many bloggers, I am starting this blog because I have things to say, but no one who has the time to listen to it all. I recently turned 40, (midlife crisis big time). I do have a lovely family (when I say lovely, I mean I love them but also often fantasize about running away and never coming back). So obviously, I have an immediate group of people living under the same roof, potential listeners. But listening to me isn’t their favourite activity. I am known as the nagging rule setter. Generally, by the time the day runs out, I have no voice left for talking. I believe that all three of them—the husband and my two children—feel the same way. I do refer to them all as my three children, often. Totally not an original joke. The classic mom joke. What a winner! The dog’s great though. We have a solid relationship. And I think it’s mostly to do with the fact that he can’t talk.

I have friends. They listen when we are in the same space. And they are great. But I don’t see them enough. I have lost the connection with some. I like the idea of rich social life, and I could have more of it if I would make an effort, but just the thought of dinner in the city at 7pm, makes me exhausted. My social circle has become people I work with. Newfound friends. A coffee run pretty much is a therapy session on daily basis.

There are professional paid listeners (a.k.a. counsellors). Many of them that charge big money aren’t that great. And the great ones charge even more money. And as much as I value my mental health, I also like to buy some new shoes and home décor, so I, yeah… Too much money for things I can Google or read on Reddit.

So here I am, feeling the need to talk. Again, self-absorbed. BUT! Because there are some other bloggers out there who have helped me feel less alone in this journey that is adulthood (which, by the way, I am still unsure I have reached. Isn’t 40 the new 25? Who can keep up with ever-changing comparisons? If this were the Stone Age, I’d be lucky to still be alive), I would love to be that person for someone else out there.

The last few years leading up to this moment have been mind-blowers. And I don’t know if it’s this stage in my life, where I have come out alive (somewhat) after caring for babies and toddlers, have returned to the workforce, and finally found 5 minutes to myself, or just this crazy world in which we live, but I am trying to figure out how to live a happy and exciting life. Some days I think I’m onto something. So, I want to share it. Some other days it’s just shit (the worries, responsibilities). And I want to share that as well. So here it is, the blog that no one asked for.